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What About the Why?

Welcome to Grace and Space, a weekly newsletter from the Deconstructing Mamas Podcast! GRACE for who you have been, are now and SPACE for who you are becoming and will be!

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There are days where I wish I could read the Bible the way I used to. Where I could get up in the morning, fresh as a daisy and sit down with my cup of hot-something and God would "speak to me" through its pages, affirming that I was on the right track. Where I could suddenly receive a verse that showed me what direction to go when making a big decision (like that time I didn't know whether or not to move to a completely different state for a new job and suddenly, in a devotional reading of Genesis, "my presence will go with you and I will give you rest" leapt out from its pages and off I went (with my husband and four kids under nine).

Where I could look at a list of emotions I was feeling with a set of verses for each one, and get the comfort I needed to get my body regulated again ("here are five verses for when you are anxious" kind of know what I mean). And now, the Bible has become a complicated, messy, strange and yet, somehow, still necessary part of my ever-evolving faith journey. And instead of asking myself about the "how to live" and the "what to do," I find myself constantly trying to figure out the "WHY the heck did someone write this?" Like seriously, WHY? Earlier this week, I sat down to read the books of I, II and III John just to test the waters after some time away from any kind of reading. I was barraged with triggers and feelings and almost had to close the tab for the "Bible Gateway" website. Words about loving God and loving others felt good and healing. But others about atonement theories and the devil made me squirm in my seat. Words that I had memorized as a young child felt soothing and grating at exact same time. I literally just had to sit in the uncomfortable space I found myself in and once again, grieve another big loss in my life because of this deconstruction journey I am compelled to continue. I'm not sure when I will open the pages of the Bible again.

It may be a week, a month, or a year. But when I do, I'll put my big girl panties on and allow it to be what it actually is and not what I force it to be. --Esther Joy Goetz-

This Week on the Podcast:

Liz Mall, apologist (fancy word for someone who uses "argument" and "reason" to make a point that something is or isn't true and she has her masters in this area of expertise), deconstructing mama of three littles and podcast hostess, is our guest this week. She and her cohost provide incredible resources for both faith deconstruction and reconstruction. They tackle subjects like hell, Biblical genocide, purity culture and even head-coverings (for those of you forced to wear them - yes, it's a thing). Liz is witty and smart and kind and knows her stuff. When she's not wrangling her three littles, you can find her doing yoga or solving the world's problems in conversations with like-minded people (like us), both her kitchen table and over Zoom.

In this episode, we tackle it ALL. Nothing is off the table. Things like "should kids read the Bible and when" and "what are some very practical steps (five to be exact) can we take when our family and friends ask us to give an apology (not the "I'm sorry" kind, but the "prove yourself" kind) for why we are deconstructing. You will leave this episode feeling empowered to continue forward on this difficult and freeing journey to figure out what you believe and why it matters.

Make sure you do NOT miss out! You can find Liz at the following: Instagram: @deconstructingthemyth



Latest News:

Support Us PLEASE and Join Our Private Facebook Community Don't forget to sign up for our private and exclusive Deconstructing Mamas community on Facebook for those of you who want to move to the next level with us via our PATREON platform.

At this level, for as little as $3, you can ask questions, experience a safe and welcoming community with others who are deconstructing and receive special surprises along the way from Lizz and Esther.

We've been doing this for several months now and it's been more than we could have imagined. We love it there and think you will too! Head to this LINK to sign up!!


Resource Alert:

Want to know what Lizz and Esther are reading right now in their book club?

Always on the lookout for great books for ourselves to read, we are loving the book, Living Resistance. In an era in which "resistance" has become tokenized, popular Indigenous author Kaitlin Curtice reclaims it as a basic human calling. Resistance is for every human who longs to see their neighbors' holistic flourishing. We each have a role to play in the world right where we are, and our everyday acts of resistance hold us all together.

Curtice shows that we can learn to practice embodied ways of belonging and connection to ourselves and one another through everyday practices, such as getting more in touch with our bodies, resting, and remembering our ancestors.

She explores four "realms of resistance"—the personal, the communal, the ancestral, and the integral—and shows how these realms overlap and why all are needed for our liberation. Listeners will be empowered to seek wholeness in whatever spheres of influence they inhabit.


Can't wait until Tuesday and need just a little snippet from our podcast episode. Here's something to whet your appetite and hold you over until then!!


One last thing. We want to remind you that we are so glad you are here. We wouldn't be the same without you. You will always find GRACE for where you've been and who you are now, and SPACE for who you are becoming and will be.

Carry on, our new-found friends. Welcome to the twisty-windy, full -of-adventure faith path that's laid out before us all. Love,

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